Ode to the
"Criminally Stoopid"
Siren Siren, sing me a song! Those of you that know Siren, know that she has taken a break from blogging. When I ran across this article, I just had to share in honor of her.
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Here's my account of how it went down....
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Crook 1: "Dude, let's go set fire to some cars."
Crook 2: "I dunno man...my ribs are still bruised from that time we tried to knock over the cows in Farmer Smith's field."
Crook 1: "Come on, pussy."
Crook 2: "Ok, if we're going to do this, let's do it right. Let's steal Jimmy's car and burn it."
Crook 1: "Ok. That sounds good. I saw this thing on TV where you can build a bomb outta a light bulb. I'm gonna call my mom and ask her how they did it."
Crook 1 presses the speed dial on his phone....
Crook 2: "It's gonna burn...will they be able to get fingerprints?"
Crook 1: "I've got the lighter, Dude. Let's go."
and four more hours of conversation ensues....
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Of course, Crook 1 had unknowingly pressed the speed dial for 911. As he and his buddy plotted their arson attempt, the cops caught it all on tape.
Now that's Criminally Stoopid.
****************************************************************
Here's my account of how it went down....
---------------------------
Crook 1: "Dude, let's go set fire to some cars."
Crook 2: "I dunno man...my ribs are still bruised from that time we tried to knock over the cows in Farmer Smith's field."
Crook 1: "Come on, pussy."
Crook 2: "Ok, if we're going to do this, let's do it right. Let's steal Jimmy's car and burn it."
Crook 1: "Ok. That sounds good. I saw this thing on TV where you can build a bomb outta a light bulb. I'm gonna call my mom and ask her how they did it."
Crook 1 presses the speed dial on his phone....
Crook 2: "It's gonna burn...will they be able to get fingerprints?"
Crook 1: "I've got the lighter, Dude. Let's go."
and four more hours of conversation ensues....
---------------------------
Of course, Crook 1 had unknowingly pressed the speed dial for 911. As he and his buddy plotted their arson attempt, the cops caught it all on tape.
Now that's Criminally Stoopid.
You were poisoned by Curare_Z at 8:10 AM
7 Death Spasms:
I'm honored :) I felt like I was there to experience the stupidity firsthand!
Thanks, Curare. You're the best :)
I offer a commenter's nod of support to your tribute to Siren. May she come back feeling refreshed and whole. (If you're around, Siren, we're rooting for you.)
This reminds me of the great dumb criminal stoires -- perhaps highlighted by Siren in the past -- wherein robbers have attempted to hold up police stations, thinking they were banks.
Wow.
-- david
Them dudes is dumb.
I hope that I'm lucky enough to have two such criminals plotting against me one day, if anyone ever tries to plot something against me, that is.
Good story, I know Siren will be happy for you to "carry the police baton", while she's away.
Maybe they should check out the self help book, 'Dialing for Dummies'.
I make dialing mistakes all the time, but I don't think I'm stoopid enough to do something like that.
Actually, maybe I am.
Siren: No, no. YOU'RE the best. :-)
DA: I revert to a comment fitting for the human odor bank: You'd think criminals like that would have enough "scents."
DC: On a hungry day, I may plot against you to steal cupcakes....
Ben: Thanks. :-)
Fuzz: At this point, I think they're only allowed one call...
Phoenix: Are you a member of Dialers Anonymous?! Admitting you have a problem is the first step...
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